Festivals, Funhouses, and Literature, oh my!

GREETINGS, MINIONS!

Or... faithful readers. As you like it.

It's been a busy whatever it's been. This blog entry covers thrice topics!

First of all was the weekend's school festival. I think it's a cool tradition that most schools here seem to put on a festival every year (I've seen it in anime, and now I've lived it! XP ) where the different clubs and organizations raise money by offering goods and services--usually food related.

The net result of all that being that I ate. A LOT.

Remember how I said I hate Japanese food? Well, that apparently excludes festival foods, which is a different thing entirely.

It was actually quite funny... and annoying... how dedicated the students were to selling you their foodstuffs. After class was over (the Japanese students got the day off, but did we? Noooo, of course not) I headed back to my bike to ride back to the dorm for my camera. On the way back, I got accosted by no less than ten Japanese students blocking my path to try to sell me junk food. And the only word I understood of any of it was "DO YOU LIKE PUMPKIN?"

When I finally managed to escape and come back, I was in a much better mood, because I wanted what they were selling.

ALL OF IT.

I ended up eating a strange omlette dish, yakisoba, yakitori, and pretty much every dessert they were selling. It was ALL freaking tasty. I did get a little annoyed--and yet amused--at one point when I tried to buy some cotton candy. I got in line and waited, but when I got to the front, some Japanese students that were also working at the festival waltzed up and asked for some.
There was obviously a glitch in the communication between the girl taking the orders and the girl making the cotton candy, because she swirled it up, and tried to hand it to me--only to have the other girl tap her and tell her to give it to one of the Japanese students. So she swirled up another one, tried to give it to me, and the process was repeated.

Finally, on the third try, I actually got some.

It was delicious.

Nothing in the festival, however, was quite as good as the tempura ice-- or fried ice cream, as you may know it. It was the only booth at the festival with an honest to go crowd around it, and for good reason.

I also stopped by my speaking partner Miku's club's set-up: Cafe Parvarati. Pay 100 yen, and get all the instant coffee and tea you can drink--as well as a show, if you come at the right time. Which I did.

Since it's a choir group, obviously, it was musical. Care for a sample?
(speaking partner on far left)
I thought it was pretty good, myself. And it was amusing that they sung so many western-style songs. But, western culture dominates, wherever you go, I guess.

I also met Miku's mother there. She didn't speak English, but we managed to engage in some basic conversation in Japanese. I was rather proud of that.

Throughout the festival, I saw many interesting photo ops. Such as an American flag waving Santa being beaten up by a power ranger and spider man.

What message is this trying to send?
Later, tried to get a photo of spidey, but he just hid behind Buddha and shot web at me.


Then there was the awesome job they did on the steps, this bold statement, and this unconventional weapon.

All in all, quite an experience.

But it pales on comparison with...

ROUND ONE.

Yesterday, I was just making a snack in the kitchen, minding my own business, when my unit-mates come in and start going on about this "Round One" place they were going to. They invited me along, and I asked what it was. "It's this awesome place with games, and bowling, and stuff."
"Sure, why not," I answered. I figured I needed to get out more, and this sounded like a good opportunity to spend time with some people who's idea of a good time isn't just getting plastered.

So, not too much later, we set out into the cold.

We started walking.

And we walked.

And we walked.

Eventually we saw a sign that said "Round One! Two Kilometers!"

Oh, you've got to be kidding me.

Regardless, it was all worth it. Every minute of it.

Round One was unlike anything I have ever seen in America.

You pay 2,000 Yen to get in (1800 for us, since we got a student discount) and from then on, everything in the entire four story complex is free for your use.

Now, just what was in the complex, you ask?

Everything.

No, really. They had EVERYTHING.

The first place we stopped was the HUGE arcade. It had pretty much every game you could think of. Arcade Mario Cart (complete with vs. mode), a multitude of rail shooters, such as every time crisis and a rip off of time crisis, and... just... well, everything.

And since we paid to come IN, we didn't have to pay for ANY of the games. We played as much as we wanted, for as LONG as we wanted.

It was bliss.

Me and Michael, my roomie, hung out for most of the time, blasting through the rail shooters. (Despite our rocky start, we've become pretty good friends. I found out he complains about EVERYTHING--not just me.) One of the ones we played, the time crisis rip-off, was extremely amusing. It was sort of innovative-- you had a charge shot that only used one bullet, and could target multiple enemies, so that you could almost clear the screen in one shot if you pulled it off right.

But the most remarkable thing about it was the characters. They were beyond bizarre. The main characters were strange--P1 was a blond guy in a rubbery looking sweater and pants--completely in red, of course. P2 was a female covered completely in blue rubber, except for eye holes.
And the bosses were invariably nearly-naked women.

Except for one guy, who was transparent, and you could see his "bionic skeleton."

I felt it was an instant classic.

There was also a skating rink, which I didn't use because I didn't know my size. A kick-boxing simluator, a mechanical bull, karaoke, and so many other things I can't even name.

And that was all on one floor.

So, we eventually headed up a floor, to spo-cha, whatever that means. It was a huge open-air sports extravaganza.

They had mini golf, archery, soccer, volleyball, batting practice, badminton, and again, pretty much everything you can imagine. I'm not a big sports fan, but even I had fun. Managed to hit a few balls, completely miss the target in archery, etc, etc.

After that, I was starting to feel a bit tuckered out, so I stopped for a brief American Snack.


Then I continued exploring the building. Inside, there were more sportsy activities, only they were solo-style, made for practicing. For instance, there was the basketball game, an indoor fishing pond where you can catch live fish, a tennis machine, and a ping-pong machine.
And, as before, many other things that I can't even name or remember.

And check this: They had an in-house manga library.
No joke. And just around the corner was the "relaxation area," a large auditorium type room full of massage chairs.
Unfortunately, I couldn't figure out how to work them.

In any case, three hours went by in a flash, and our time was up.

We had probably only done about 20 percent of the activities available.

WHY hadn't I been coming here EVERY WEEKEND?

We all put our jackets back on, and started on the long walk back home, feeling tired but exceedingly content. None of us could stop talking about how awesome the place had been.

The whole experience left me a bit wired, so I stayed up until the wee hours and felt like crap the next day. Hooray!

And now, here's something you probably weren't aware of:

It's National Novel Writing Month!
And yours truly, being the lovable idiot that you know him to be, has decided to sign up.

It's gonna be about zombies! : D

The Bumbling Gaitaku

"The strangest thing happened to me today."
"Oh?"
"Yes, I saw this Gaijin Otaku."
"Eh? A Gaijin Otaku?"
"Yeah. He was a Gaijin, but dressed like an Otaku."
"That's pretty strange."
"Mm. But that's not the weird part."
"Oh?"
"No. See, while he was walking down the stairs, he suddenly tripped and fell down them. It looked like he twisted his ankle, too."
"Ouch! That must have hurt."
"That's what I thought, but when he fell, he just started laughing and got back up!"
"Eh? Was he okay?"
"I asked him. He said yes, laughed again, and walked out with a big grin on his face."
"Gaijin are weird."
"Yeah..."

This inevitable conversation has been brought to you by the Bumbling Gaitaku (Gaijin Otaku).

It's only fair that I give the Japanese something to talk about while I'm here. After all, they give me PLENTY to talk about, most of it rather surreal.
For instance, this scene took place in an Anime Art Gallery. Where you can buy paintings of your favorite Evangelion character for a few thousand dollars a pop. That's dollars, folks. Not yen.

This was all part of yet another trip into Den Den Town. Lemme just break it up into a series of surreal moments.

Surreal Moment #1: Finding a six story store called "Super Kids Land" that had a floor of extremely realistic gun replicas and air pistols and two floors of risque anime figures.

Surreal Moment #2: Anime on LAZERDISC. [x] [x]

Surreal Moment #3: Finding Loony Tunes and Disney characters that look like they're ready to kick my ass.


Surreal Moment #4: This. Do I really need to say anything?
(Holy crap, I just noticed there's a glass of water in there in case she gets thirsty.)

Surreal Moment #5: This sign.

Surreal Moment #6: Seeing a Japanese business man in a suit and tie carefully pick up and scrutinize, from every angle, a box containing figures of pre-pubescent girls with removable skirts.

Surreal Moment #7: Seeing a Japanese person walk through the otaku district wearing a Lynyrd Skynyrd T-shirt.


And last but not least: Surreal Moment #8: The best thing I've ever ever seen, done, or eaten.

That's it for now. More news as it develops.

--TIM

Mama, I'm coming home.

Hey, guys. Sorry for the long silence. I was actually on a rockin trip last weekend, but just haven't had the time/energy to write about it... I'll see if I can get it in THIS weekend. XD You can check my photobucket for pictures.

But, hey. On to the main subject of this post.

I'm coming home.


No, not right now. I'm gonna finish out this semester, of course. But I'm not staying for the second.

Now, don't get me wrong. It's been fun. It'll continue to be fun for the last half of this semester, or so I presume. But really, I think that's enough.

I've been here. I've seen the sights, I've bought the plastic junk, I've ridden the trains, and completely failed to interact with the locals. And I think after another half-semester of this, it's time to pack it up and head back to where I belong.

Because that's what this trip has made me realize. I don't belong here. I guess a little piece of me thought I did. Every anime fan has that nagging voice that tells them that Japan is the greatest place in the world, and that all their problems will be solved if they go live there.

But it's all bunk.

I never realized it, but I had a good thing going for me back home. I had a family. Great friends, both in my hometown and at college. D&D, Kung Fu, and all the anime I could watch. And all the little things that you take for granted.

I wasn't stared at in public. I could go places without feeling completely awkward and unable to communicate. The people around me spoke English. The food was varied, tasty, and... recognizable. (I REALLY don't like Japanese food.) I could read the signs, I knew where to buy what, what section it would be in, and what it would look like. I could drive myself wherever I wanted to go, instead of being crammed into a train like a sardine, with NO handholds so that every time the train lurches I almost tumble into the people around me.

I thought, maybe, in Japan, I would meet more people like me. But I took for granted that I already KNEW people like me back home. And forgot that no matter what kind of Japanese person I found, we wouldn't be able to communicate, our cultures would be completely different, and I'd always be looked at as a Gaijin. And I also failed to realize that the international students here would be just like students anywhere else.

I got annoyed with Tuscaloosa, Alabama, and America in general, quite a lot. The people there were loud, I thought. They lived to drink and party. Well, it's no different here. Whether they're international or Japanese, most people here seem to be no less annoying than the people I left back home. I guess college students are college students, wherever you go, and drinking here seems to be even more popular, since the age is lowered, it's not taboo at all, and it's available everywhere--including the vending machine about two minutes from the dorm.

I'm not saying I made a mistake. It's been fun. I love seeing the sights, and cruising the Otaku district. And I've met some cool people, both gaijin and Japanese.

But now that I think of it, it was never my idea to stay a year in the first place. I only wanted to do a semester, but the woman in charge of the international programs convinced me to do a year.

Well, I think I had the right idea to begin with.

It's been great. But after all's said and done, I think that Japan is a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live here. And one semester is a plenty long visit, if you ask me.

TIM Goes to Hollywood

So, picture this. You're in Japan, and you have a three day weekend--the third one of this semester, and the second one you're not sick for. What should you do? Go see temples in Kyoto? Maybe go check out Osaka Castle?

Heck no. You go to USJ--Universal Studios Japan.

It's just like every other Universal Studios. It's got the same rides, from the same movies. The same overpriced merchandise. But it's in Japan, and it's filled with Japanese people. So why not.

I actually had to plan ahead for this. You see, the school has this running thing called the "Experience Japan Program." The way it works is that a bunch of Japanese students get together and plan some kind of event, and they take a certain amount of Americans with them. You have to sign up for it.

Now, last month, there was a trip to USJ. The Japanese students had agreed to take about five American students. I went to check out the possible trips, and that one sounded good. So I looked at the sign-up sheet.

It clearly stated that only five people would be taken. There was a line after the five people mark on the sign-up sheet.

So what do people do? After five people sign up, they go right past the line and fill up the ENTIRE DANG PAGE. And then they flip it on the back, and draw more lines, and put their names there.

I have no idea what happened with that trip. I can only assume that the first five people went, and they sent emails to everyone else that said "Hey, you stupid Gaijin. You can't come, and you can't read, either."

But they did the same trip again this month, except with only four people. And better yet, it was during the halloween season, so the whole park would be done up for it.

Well, the day after that trip was announced, I went down to the CIE office and signed up. I was the fourth-AKA last-person to sign up. I noticed this time they put X's through all the other lines. I'll bet some more people still signed up, anyway.

Anyway, come Sunday, the day was finally here. I was psyched. I decided to travel light, only taking my camera with me. You can find all the photos in my photobucket album.

Since I've learned not to trust the bus system, I decided to get an early start. Now, since we were meeting at 9:30, and I don't have any classes before 10:00, that meant that I was getting up earlier than early. I think it was around 7:30, actually. Yeah, I hear you. Boo-hoo, 7:30. Well, it's early for me.

Anyway, when I woke up, I felt like puking, but I usually feel that way when I get up early, so I didn't let it distract me. I got cleaned up and headed for the bus station. Checked the schedule. I had about 20 minutes till the next bus. Bought some grape Fanta. I was thinking, man. I'll be there in plenty of time.

That's about when I remembered that I didn't write down the name of the place we were meeting.

I looked at my watch. I looked at the schedule.

I looked at my grape fanta.

Stashed the fanta on top of the vending machine, and made a mad dash back to the dorm. I had ten minutes to get there, find out where we're meeting, and get back and get on the bus.

I generally make it a policy of mine that I don't run anywhere. It takes me a long time to get tired from walking, but I get winded in about ten seconds from running. It just doesn't seem worth it.

I ran today. I was looking FORWARDS to this, dangit. I wasn't gonna let a little detail like not knowing where I was going get in the way of it.

I ended up making it with about two minutes to spare, which I spent decided whether or not to drink the Fanta, despite the fact that someone might have put a cigarette out in it.

I did.

The bus actually didn't hit any traffic for once, and I showed up half an hour early.

Since I had skipped breakfast, I took the opportunity to try to scrounge up some food at the convenience store we were supposed to meet at. I ended up settling on a peanut butter sandwich, the only instance of peanut butter I had seen thus far in Japan. Not that it tasted like peanut butter, mind you. It wasn't thick and oily and salty... it was... fluffy. And sweet.

But, whatever. It did the job.

Eventually, we all met up. All told, we were me, two Belgium guys, and five good-looking Japanese girls that didn't speak a lick of English.

Oh, yeah. This was going to be a good day.

Hah! Take THAT Universe!

Thought you could ruin me, huh? Well, screw you AND your gay porn. I borrowed a needle and thread from The Monk, AKA Andrew, our resident Zen-ologist, and managed to patch my juggling ball up as best I could.

It ain't pretty, but hopefully it will hold together until I can get a new one.

Life is Juggle.

--TIM

Alright, settle down class. Now, today we're going to be talking about Gay Porn.

Okay, guys. Thus far, I've tried to keep this blog relatively family friendly. I don't know how well I've succeeded, but dangit, I've tried.

But there's no way to sugarcoat what this entry is about. There's gonna be adult content, and probably some strong language. So if you're under 18, or just don't want any part of all this, then go away NOW. There'll be a new entry soon about an awesome trip I took, that you'll enjoy way more than this. But I just gotta get this off my chest.

Gone? Good. I wish I was.

I don't think I've talked too much about my classes so far. I'm taking four: Two of them are Japanese language classes, one of them is about Everday Life and Culture in Japan, and the other is about Japanese pop culture.

Thus far, the pop culture class has been my favorite. The everyday life class is pretty dry and involves a lot of "theory." And the language classes are, well. Language classes.

So the pop culture has been the best by far.

Why am I bringing this up now? Well, like the title of this post states, today we're talking about gay porn.

Now, generally, I feel the same way about gay porn that I feel about homosexuality in general: I don't really care, as long as I don't get any on me.

Well, I got a big huge faceful today.

And where did I come in contact with this? Why, where else but my culture class.


Yeah. You putting all the pieces together, chumly?

Quite frankly, I've always suspected that my teacher was a little Light in the Loafers. But this pretty much cinched it.

Technically, the syllabus says that today's lecture was about Dōjinshi and yaoi.

Now, Dōjinshi is pretty interesting stuff. They're amateur comics, and there really isn't anything like them in the states. This is because in Japan, the copyright laws are hardly ever enforced, so fans can get away with making almost professional grade comics about existing characters and sell them for cash money, as long as they don't make too much of a profit.

Sure, a lot of Dōjinshi are pornographic. I guess that's only natural. After all, that's what's gonna sell, right? The hardcore stuff that real publishers won't touch.

And it just so happens that a lot of these "adult" Dōjinshi are, in fact, Yaoi. Don't recognize that word?

Good.

Were you expecting a blue link? You're not getting one. And for god's sake, don't type it into a search engine.

Yaoi is, in a nutshell, a pornographic manga about two male characters, oftentimes lifted straight from a legit manga, who fall in love and do the horizontal monster mash together.

Yeah, real appealing, right? It doesn't even matter if said characters are, in the work they're lifted from, completely straight, married with children, violent homophobes, etc. Because one of the rules of Yaoi is that EVERYONE is gay in Yaoi.

We had a reading about this that I had to do last night. Yeah. 35 pages about gay porn. I tell you, that's how I like to spend my evenings.

Technically, six pages were about other things. But the vast majority was all about yaoi.

Despite this, it wasn't THAT bad. I actually read it, partially out of a sense of duty towards my class, but also because it wasn't about the medium itself, but about the psychology behind it.

Because this stuff isn't produced or targeted at gay men. It's made by and sold to women and girls. They freaking eat it up here. Why? Well, that's what the reading was trying to figure out. Because it really doesn't make any sense. There are hardly any women in these things, and if they do exist, they're usually evil, or annoying, or just there to cause jealousy and strife. They're hated characters. And apparently, the pretty boys in the yaoi hate women in general.

So why do women eat this stuff up? Good question. Go read 35 pages about it, and then maybe you'll figure it out, even though I haven't.

So, yeah. That wasn't so bad. How did it not cross my mind that after doing the readings, of course we were going to have a CLASS about it? I should have known as soon as my lunch rang up as 444, the unluckiest number in Japanese culture, that things were about to go downhill.

So, it might not have been so bad if we had stuck to the culture aspect. The only problem is that lately, the prof is doing this thing where he lets a group of classmembers lead the discussion.

And today was about Yaoi. Dear god, if that's not a recipie for disaster, I don't know what is.

So they start by passing the stuff OUT to the class. In fact, the prof has some issues of his own that he passes out. Every gets at least one copy of this stuff. I didn't take one, so eventually one of the girls doing the discussion comes and forces one on me that she says doesn't have any sex in it.

So while all the girls and the one gay guy are all giggling and exclaiming over this stuff, and the guys are sitting around awkwardly, one of the discussion leaders leaves to fetch a video cable, so she can show us her powerpoint presentation on the subject. What was on this powerpoint?

I have no idea, and god willing, I'll never find out. They couldn't get it to work.

So we skipped right to the next part: the prof pulled out a DVD that he had bought on the internet, that was a fansubbed copy of a "shounen-ai" piece. "shounen-ai" is Japanese for "Boy Love." It's basically yaoi, with the explicit bits taken out.

Put that in a nutshell, and our professor showed us a tape of tame, animated, gay porn.


It was the most surreal thing I've ever experienced. Here we were sitting in class, watching this cartoon about boys who love boys. Some people say that anime is not realistic, but if that's true, then this crap was completely disconnected from any sense of reality. All the characters are tall skinny males. They're ALL gay. It's not even a question. If two of them run into eachother, there's never any uncertainty, they just automatically start lusting after one another's bods.

Like I said, there was the bit appearances of women, but their only job is to hang all over the dominant pretty boy and make the girly pretty boy feel jealous.

And here's the kicker. The title of this thing was something like "papa kiss me in the dark."
Well, it was about a gay love thing going on between this guy who's JUST STARTING HIS FIRST YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL and a person who appears to be his FATHER, although there appears to be maybe a two-year age difference between them.

Just... there are no words. It was the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen. Every time two characters meet, they end up in eachother's arms. They don't talk like human beings. Two guys meet for the first time, and one of them acts like a little girl, and the other one talks about him being cute. It breaks all rules of normal human behavior.

Like I said, there was no explicit sex. But oh, the sex was there. You never saw anything below the belt, if you know what I mean, but oh, it was fucking there in every other possible sense.

And then, after that, the class was over.

That was it. We showed up to class and the only thing we accomplished was to look at gay porn. And to quote the professor "We'll be continuing this Friday."

WHAT THE FUCK. What in God's name was the point of all that?

And while I was writing this, one of my juggling balls split a seam, and so now I can't even do that, which is always good for putting me into a really level zen state.

What a day this has been.

Screw it. I'm gonna go find some violent video games to play.

This is TIM, signing out.

I suggest the fried pork cutlet with a side of not killing me, please.

Hi, internet. Remember that whole post about me getting on that guy's hit-list?

Well, I decided there was only one way to deal with the problem.

I had lunch with him.


This was not something I planned on, but it wasn't an accident either. I was navigating the crowded lunch room, looking for an empty table, when I saw a friend of mine, instead. I moved over to sit near him, but it was a little crowded at that part of the table. However, there was a large empty space a few seats down.

And in that space was Alexander-san.

So I plopped right down, and said "Howdy, Alexander-san."

"You know, I still haven't seen that movie," he replied.

"Eh?"

"V for Vendetta," and he points at me.

I look down and realize that I am, thankfully, wearing my V for Vendetta shirt.

"Oh, yeah." I say. "It's really good. You should check it out," I say.

"Did they give you two pork cutlets with your food?!"

"Um..." I poke at my food. "Maybe... one and a half?"

"Huh. But yeah, I never understood about that movie why they chose Guy Fawkes. He was this crazy, fricking pro-catholic terrorist who wanted Catholicism to take over the government and kill all the protestants."

He seemed angry about this.

I came to find out during the course of our lunch that he seems angry about pretty much everything.

He was angry about V for Vendetta. He was angry about filmmaking. V for Vendetta led to politics, and he seemed to be angry at the left wing, and the right wing. He was angry at fascism, and the people that worry about fascism. He wasn't, however, angry at weapons, which he vaguely alluded to as "Our defense against fascism." He also mentioned that he thought that the government should be overthrown, possibly through force, every 20 years. He also angrily stated that in every 50-100 year period, two things are constant: The world gets better, and people become convinced that it's getting worse.

He was angry at the middle east. He was angry at religion. He was angry at religion for being the cause of turmoil in the middle east. He vaguely alluded to more stuff about just what we might do to solve that little problem.

He wasn't angry at Freedom, however. But he seemed to get angry at the idea that freedom means different things to different people.

He was angry, in fact, about pretty much everything we talked about.

"I'll try to check out that move," he said as I left.

"It's a good one," I assured him.

I will admit, I left that lunch table more scared of him than when I sat down. And I got progressively more uncomfortable the longer I talked with him. Not coincidentally, I also started eating faster and faster the longer I was there.

But I feel reassured. Because the one thing he didn't seem to be angry at, in particular, was me.

Alright, buddy. You just made my list.

I appear to have made an error in judgment.

I think I'm on someone's hit list.

Lemme back up a bit. There's a guy in my Japanese classes that basically reminds me of me back at Alabama. That is, he usually has no idea what's going on, and when he's called on he just mumbles answers until either he gets it right or the teacher gives up and tells him. In class, he goes by Alexander-san.

He also appears to be fairly socially... stunted. Another reason he reminds me o' meself.

So all in all, I usually feel kinda bad for him.

I also usually don't have any direct contact with him, since I usually sit on the opposite side of the room from him. But not today. Today, we were right side-by-side.

So naturally, when it came time to do partner work, we were paired together. It was our job to ask each other to go do stuff, and then come up with excuses not to.

When we were at the part where we'd do it aloud for the class, he decided to ask me to go see a movie. Now, the word for movie is "eiga." And the word for English is "Eigo." So naturally, they're pretty easy to confuse. And he did so.

And you know me. Always cracking the wise.

I couldn't resist asking, "Did you just ask me to go see English?"

It didn't seem to get much of a reaction from anyone, including Alexander-san, who just mumbled his correction.

Soon, it was time for class to be over. I was walking down the hall, when one of my classmates called my name. "Hey, *****. You're my new hero."
"Why?" I asked.
"'Did you just ask me to go see English with you?'"

Huh, I thought. I mean, it was funny, but it wasn't THAT funny.
"Thanks," I said, and chuckled.

I went down the stairs, and there I ran into another one of my classmates. She high-fived me, and started chanting "Who's afraid of Alexander-san! Not you!"

At this point I was a little perplexed.

That's when I found out that most of the people in that class are SCARED of him. Not in the "I'm gonna beat you up and take your lunchmoney" kind of way. The "Someday you'll see. You just keep pushing and pushing, and one day I'm going to bring a gun to school and show you ALL who's boss" kind of way...

Apparently, he's been known to talk about how he regrets that he wasn't able to bring his gun with him to school. And there's that shirt he always wears that says "Celebrate Diversity" on it, with rows and rows of different handguns.

So...
Umm...

If I've made it onto some kind of hit list, and end up getting shot by this guy...

In the words of Coach Z:

"I regret everything!"

TIM's Hot Cooking Time

As some of you already know, I have not been eating exactly... healthy...ly since getting here. My dinner is usually bought at the convenience store, and lunch is generally eaten either in the Cafeteria, or at McDonald's.
Now, unfortunately, not only is this unhealthy, it is very expensive. I've known for a while that if I'm going to be here a while, I'd have to change my eating habits. So, today I finally sucked it up and went grocery shopping.

I keep hearing that a place called Fresco is good, so I decided to head there for the first time. On the way there, I almost killed a little old lady.

This is not funny. I feel absolutely horrible about it.

We were both on bikes, and she was going rather slowly. I moved in and tried to pass her, and at the same time she tried to turn. She had to swerve to avoid me, and she took a spill. Me, being a big dumb foreigner, could only stand there and repeat "I'm sorry!" and "Are you okay?" in Japanese. She wouldn't even let me help her up. She seemed very angry. She gave me a long talking to about what I had done wrong and what an idiot I was, but I couldn't understand hardly any of it. (I understood "idiot," though.)

Eventually, she picked up her bike and stalked off. I was incredibly shaken up, and I waited for her to go to make sure she was alright, then got back on my bike and just started riding in the direction I had been going.

I had no idea where I was, or what I was doing, I just knew I needed to get away from the scene of that incident. I must have ridden for about 15 minutes before I finally acknowledged that
I had no idea where I was going, and it was probably best to backtrack. So I went all the way back, and I finally found the Fresco. A few feet away from where the accident was.
I guess that's where she was going...

I did the only thing I could do. I went inside, and hoped that in the 30 minutes I had been riding around dazedly, she had done her shopping and left. I swear to you, though. Ever since that happened, every old lady I've seen has been THAT old lady, in my eyes. And there are a LOT of old ladies in Japan.

Ugh. On to less... distressing things.

My goal in going shopping was to imitate what I had seen a couple of my other unitmates doing: make a simple meal, that included rice, vegetables, and meat. Seems simple enough, yeah?

Unfortunately, I was pretty much out of everything, so that wasn't all that I needed to buy. Also unfortunately, there was only so much that was gonna fit in that little basket on my bike.

There was a lot of me picking stuff up, and then later putting it back, figuring I'll just buy it at the dollar grocery store later. There was enough stuff here that I needed that I couldn't get anywhere else, I figured I should concentrate on that.

So, I got me a big ol bag of rice. Got me some unidentified meat. Soy sauce. Vegetable oil. Bread. Etc, etc. But I looked all around the store, and I could not find mixed vegetables. The only other alternative was to buy some fresh ones, and chop and mix them myself. Now, not only is that way too much work, I figured it would be expensive, because they'd probably all go bad before I could use them all. So I just gave up on that part, and decided to look for them elsewhere.

I took my bulging shopping basket to the counter, paid about 4,000 Yen (Do I really need to keep converting it into dollars for you guys?), and hauled it out to my bike.

Well, first I had to bag it. Interestingly enough, in Japan, they don't do that for you. They take your shopping basket, right? And as they pull the items out, and ring them up, they put them in a DIFFERENT shopping basket. After you're done, they give you a couple bags and your new basket, and send you over to a bagging counter, where you do the dirty work yourself. That's... efficient, I guess.

Anyway. Even with all the stuff I put back, I STILL didn't have room for everything in the basket, so I had to hang a bag off the handlebars. I figure I won't usually have to buy this much stuff at once, as things like the big bag o rice, oil, and soy sauce aught to last me a while.

Anyway... I got back home without hitting anyone else. I was still really jittery, though. I swear, I felt the eyes of every Japanese person in the store and on the street that day, as if they were looking at me and saying "We know what you did! You stupid Gaijin! You knocked that old woman down!"

Gaah. I'm not exaggerating, either. The entire experience has been extremely nerve-wracking.

Anyway. I managed to get home, and about half of my unit-mates were there.

Unfortunately, none of them knew how to use the rice cooker. So, I just decided to work from the instructions provided and see where it got me (even though various measurements did not add up, such as the rice cooker measuring water in cups, and the measuring cup measuring rice in... I dunno. Hundreds of stuff.

But I did what I could. About 40 minutes later, I set to work on the meat part. Got a pan, poured oil in it, and started frying up the meat.

Decidedly AFTER the rice should have been done, the little "finished" light still had not come on yet. Someone came by who actually knew how to use the rice-cooker, and told me I had failed to start it in the first place.

Before smacking myself on the head and cursing my stupidity, I opened the rice cooker.

It was filled with puffy, cooked rice. Looks like I had done something right after all.

Anyway, put it all together, add a liberal dose of soy sauce, and viola!

My first meal ever cooked in Japan.


Don't look like much. The rice was a bit hard and chewy. But it's a start, by god.

Even if I had to go through hell and back just to get the ingredients together.

Well, I've got work to do.

This is TIM,

Signing off.

Life doesn't always work out the way we want it to, does it sweetie?

Well, I don't think I mentioned this in my blog before, but I made a pact with myself. And that was that instead of wasting away all my time here, at least once a week, I'd get out and do something. Today was supposed to be that day. I got most of my studying done yesterday, and figured I'd do some sightseeing in Kyoto today. So, I got up, and it was raining outside.
I checked the weather for Kyoto. Rain all day.

I checked the weather for Osaka. Rain all day.


Well, screw you, weather. I guess I'll just say inside all day, studying and practicing my juggling.

Oh, yeah. I juggle now. Or rather, I'm learning. My speaking partner Miku gave me a few souvenirs from a trip she took as a thank you for the gifts I brought her from America. She's really too nice. Anyway, one of them was three juggling balls. So ever since then, I've been trying to get the hang of them. This video has been pretty useful. Right now I'm on step 9.

I guess maybe if I study all day today as well, I'll have some free time during the week to do something interesting.

Anyway. On the off chance that any of you were wondering about dorm life, heres a brief update.

My roommate is still crazy, but we're getting along much better. After we had a friendly chat about how things are going between us, he no longer acts like he wants me gone or dead, and we have conversations about things other than how much noise my lungs are making.

I'm also getting along pretty well with the other people in my unit.


I'm not, however, getting along too well with one of their friends who likes to visit. Often.

Her name is Jen, and she's from 4chan. For those of you who don't know what 4chan is, consider yourself lucky, and pray you never really find out. In summary, 4chan is the cess pool of the internet. Everyone's identity is anonymous, and in most parts of the site, there are no rules. Which means that flaming, arguing, personal attacks, racism, pornography, violence, and offensive jokes are not only allowed, they are practically encouraged.

4chan would be easy enough to ignore, if only it stayed on it's own website. But they make a habit of invading other sites they don't like (which is pretty much every site that is not 4chan), and what's more, they are something of internet trend-setters. Which means that their jokes and sayings tend to spread to all parts of the internet like some horrid virus.

Jen is the worst example of a 4channer. Practically everything out of her mouth is a 4chan-ism. If she's not spouting out their jokes or lingo, she's dragging in her laptop to show people the latest pictures she downloaded from the site.

What's more, she seems to have taken an instant dislike to me, and even worse, whenever she's around, the level of conversation in the dorm tends to degrade to the same level things generally stayed at in my old unit.

I suppose, all in all, I aught to be thankful she doesn't actually live here, and that things are fairly nice when she's gone.

Oh, and I am trying a bit harder on the making friends thing, with some amount of success. One of my "pals" that I talk to a lot in my classes was talking about his plans for going to a cool restaurant and then to an arcade after class on Friday. Since I, as usual, had nothing planned, I finally got the guts to drop some hints that I would be interested in going along with him. He picked up on it, and told me that would be fine. We met at his dorm, and I got to meet a couple of his friends, and we all watched Dragon Ball Z before going out on the town and having a pretty good time. The restaurant was awesome, and I don't think I have gotten as full as I did that night since coming to Japan. The arcade was a bit small, but also fun. We had some fun shooting zombies in Silent Hill, and then struck wacky and embarrassing poses in one of the ever-popular and ever-present Japanese photo booths.

So, that's my life, for better or for worse.

Blog at you later.

This is TIM, signing off.

TIM goes to Den Den Town (Or: Kids, Don't Trust What You Read on the Internet)

Well, come Monday, it was finally time to do what I came here for: Geek Out.

I was bound for Den Den Town, aka Nipponbashi, the Otaku Capital of Osaka. Several days before, I had painstakingly researched how to get there. I went to the official English-language Osaka Tourism page, and printed out directions on how to get to Osaka from the Keihan Line (the train that runs through my city), and how to get to Nipponbashi once I got there. Then I printed out maps, lists of stores in the area, the whole shebang.

I had my alarm set for 9:00 in the morning, and actually managed to get up sometime around 9:30. Around 10:30, I was fed and sanitized sufficiently to go out in public. So I hoofed it to the nearest bus stop (having sufficiently gotten over my phobia of getting kicked off again), and headed for the station.

I took a moment to admire the Freudian sculpture at the entrance, and then began studying the map of stops. I found the one that matched where my directions told me I should go, bought my ticket, managed to find the right platform, and waited.

Finally, a train came by that had a sign on it indicating that it was both The Express, and bound in the proper direction. I boarded, rife with anticipation.
Well, the ride took a while. I'm not sure how long, but it gave me plenty of time to admire the scenery, and marvel at the continuing success of the Pokemon empire. I had to change trains a couple times, as per the instructions I had printed out, and I managed to do so without incident. Finally, I arrived! I left the train, full of excitement. I looked around the station, trying to figure out if it connected anywhere with the subway, the fastest way to get to Den Den Town.
The only thing I noticed, however, was a sign pointing the way to the Kyoto Tour Bus.
Weird, I thought. Why would people go to Kyoto from Osaka? I brushed it off and made for the exit.
And there I was! Osaka!
But...
It's not quite as... city-like as I expected. Oh, well, I figured. I must be on the outskirts. I looked around for the entrance to the subway, but couldn't find it. I did, however, confirm that the burgers sold there were NOT homosexual.
I found a bus stop, and thought that perhaps I could get to Den Den town by bus. But I didn't have any directions for that... which meant I'd have to ask someone. And I figured if I were to ask anyone, it might as well be the staff at the station. So, I backtracked and went back underground and found the help booth.
I entered, and said, in halting Japanese, "Excuse me. I want to go to Den Den Town, but... I don't know/don't understand."
Well, the lady at the booth didn't understand either. I decided to make it simpler.
"Den Den Town," I said. "Nipponbashi," and showed here the name on paper.
"Ah, Nipponbashi," she said. She pulled out a Japanese-language and English-language subway map, and compared them for a moment. Then she turned the English map towards me, and circled one of the stops. "Here," she said. Then she circled another one, one that looked very far away. "You go here. Transfer subway. Ride to Nipponbashi."
"Thank you very much," I said, and took the map with me.
Well, I was a little cheesed off. I had just gotten there, and I had to get on the train again?

I studied the list of stops again. Okay, here's where I am... where's this stop I'm going to?
Wait... THERE it is. Wait. It's on, like, the complete...opposite...side...

I frantically pulled out the map again, and found the two stops she had circled. I looked at the one I was headed for, then my eyes darted to the one I was at. Then they zoomed out a bit to take in the name of the city I was in:


Kyoto.


OH MY GOD! WHY? WHY DID THE DIRECTIONS FROM THE OSAKA TOURISM AGENCY TAKE ME TO KYOTO!? THAT'S THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF WHERE I WANT TO GO!
The Keihan line was MADE TO CONNECT OSAKA AND KYOTO. I went AS FAR AS POSSIBLE in the WRONG direction. Did Osaka hate tourists so much, that it tried to ship them all to a different city?!

After frothing at the mouth for a while, and banging my head against the concrete wall, I composed myself enough to buy a ticket aaaaallll the way back, back past Hirakata-shi where I started, aaaallll the way to the other end of the rail line, AKA Osaka.

I fumed on the train for what seemed like an hour, listening to ANGRY music on my ipod, until FINALLY, I arrived.

At the REAL Osaka.

Maybe.

This time I didn't even see the light of day. I immediately found the sign directing me to the subway, so I went down, down, down, deep into the bowels of the Earth. Finally, I arrived at the ticket machine. Here's what the route looked like.

Fortunately, there was a handy chart nearby listing the stops in alphabetical order, along with the price of the ticket to get there. I've never been so glad I can read hiragana...

So, ticket bought, dingy subway boarded, and I was left to stew in my anticipation once again.

Finally, I arrived at the stop indicated by the directions I printed off...
Well, maybe that wasn't the smartest thing to rely on, but seriously, I'd like to see them get me to Kyoto from the OSAKA SUBWAY LINE.

Regardless, the train stopped, I got up, and sprinted up the stairs.

And up the escalator.

And some more stairs.

MAN was I underground.

FINALLY, I REACHED DAYLIGHT!
Huh. Looks like it had been raining. Oh, well. Gotta look around... make sure I'm in the right place.
Let's see....
Five Stories of Windows-related software.
Big, flashy electronics stores.
Giant ad for Manga shop...
An Akira billboard...
A Gundam painted on a four story Gundam shop...

Welcome home, TIM. Welcome home.

I was finally there. I just about fainted from excitement.

No, wait. That's hunger. The plan had been to get there in time for lunch. But what should have taken about half an hour and cost me about $5, had taken more like three hours and cost me closer to $15. So at this point, I was starving.

Now... an acquaintance of mine who had been there earlier had assured me that there were these things called Maid Cafes everywhere. Now, I know. It sounds...
creepy. I won't argue with you there. But I figured, when in Japan, do as the Otaku do, so I thought I might check one out.

Well, I walked a few blocks, and I guess all the maids were staying in out of the rain, because there were none to be seen. In fact, the only food I saw was a two story McDonald's.

Ah, well. Works for me.

I feasted on double cheese, and then hit the streets, refreshed and re-energized. First stop: That AWESOME Gundam building.

Now, you already saw the outer facade. But the show doesn't stop there. Right at the entrance, there's a big ol' person sized model. It could be mine for $1,750! And then on the inside, all the merchandise you could possibly want. And it wasn't just sitting in boxes on the shelf, either. They had lots of massive battle scenes and other displays. [x] [x] [x] [x]
And of course, the chixx0rz.

Not only that, they also had leggo gundams, and gundam puzzles, and costumes, and clothing,
and that's about when the clerk came up to me and pointed at one of the many prominent "No Photographs" signs you MIGHT have already noticed, but that I, in my excitement, overlooked.

I awkwardly apologized, and started to put my camera away.

JUST THEN, THE BUILDING SHOOK, AS A GIGANTIC ROBOT FIST SLAMMED THROUGH THE WALL, SENDING SPARKS AND SHRAPNEL FLYING EVERYWHERE! I JUST HAD TIME TO SNAP THIS ONE PICTURE BEFORE IT WITHDREW, TAKING MOST OF THE WALL WITH IT!


No, not really.


What actually happened was that I excused myself, and headed for the escalator to the second story. At the top, there was this MAGNIFICENT display of a life-sized gundam fist protruding through the wall, with the lights all flickery and everything, like it had just punched through and shorted out everything. I could only gape at it as I passed by.

Well, I know that they said "no pictures."

But I was a BAD GAIJIN! BAD!

I lurked around the top floor for a while longer, then walked back down to the bottom. Lurked there, then made for the escalator again. As soon as no clerks were in sight, I whipped out the camera and tried for one good shot.

As you can see, I failed. But, oh well. Better than nothing.

Anyway, somewhere throughout my cavorting about, I found this awesome little stress ball. It was just a little over a dollar, so I knew I had to have it.
Which left the rest of the shop.

Now, I've never been a huge fan of the Gundam franchise. I've seen maybe two or three episodes of any of the normal shows, and almost a full season of the "weird spin-off" show.

All the same, I knew I had to have a Gundam. Just one! They're so cool.

At first, I figured I'd be adventurous and get a model I'd have to put together myself. This was abandoned once I realized I couldn't read the difficulty ratings on the boxes, and I had as much chance as getting an expert level kit as a beginner one. So I started browsing the action figures.

They all looked pretty cool, but one caught my eye.

Okay, three. It was a three-pack; a trio of dark-colored gundams. I had never seen Gundams like this; they were almost always white, red, blue, you know, bright colors. I looked and looked for a single one that I'd rather have, but couldn't find one. So, I sprung for the three-pack.

Wallet: Ow.
Me: Shut up.


Total cost of this store: 3,612 Yen ($31.36)

After that, I set about exploring once more.

In the course of my adventures, I happened to meet my professor outside of a porn shop.

Okay, that's not exactly FAIR. Because about 80% of the shops there qualify as one, depending on your standards. But like most of them, the bottom floor was clean stuff (well, mostly. Separating the family friendly from the adult entertainment is not exactly a priority with the Japanese.)

Anyway, we chatted for a while, and then split off, with me going into the store he had presumably just left. The first thing I noticed inside was the cashier.
She was, how you say, very into the spirit of things. That is to say, she was cosplaying a character from one of my favorite anime. After waiting for her to be un-busy, and getting over a sudden bout of shyness, I managed to muster up the courage to stammeringly ask her if I could take her picture (in Japanese). She agreed, and struck a pose. Come to think of it, I'm not sure which character she was supposed to be...since none of them had hair like that...
Ah, well. No use worrying over the details.

In any case, after that I set about exploring the store. The place was jam-packed with figures and comic books of every kind. Couldn't read the books, so I mostly concentrated on the figures. A lot of them were actually from Gachapon, the little capsule machines you put a couple dollars in, turn the crank, and get a cheap prize? Well, those things are a much bigger deal here, with turns at them ranging up to three dollars, and the prizes are much better. Anyway, apparently selling them individually is big business, because you can charge more than the machines, since customers can choose which one they're buying.

Well, I ended up not buying anything there. I ogled over a couple Haruhi figures, but at over $100, there was no way I was dropping the cash for those things. So, it was time to move on.

The next shop I hit, I almost missed. From the outside, it looked like it just had some girly costumes. But then I noticed the stream of people of both genders going in and out, and decided it might be worth a look-see. I was glad I did. For this was the store where I hit my largest jackpot, and scored the deepest wound on my wallet.

It did indeed have costumes of every description, but oh, it had so much more. Namely, it had what I had been wanting all along: Haruhi figures at prices I could afford.

I actually explored the store for a long time before I found them. There was no lack of things to look at. Figures, Gachapon prizes, trading cards, costumes, CDs, DVDs, practically everything an Otaku could want. Finally, I came across a shelf jam packed with them.

But which ones should I choose?! There were too many. Different sizes, different poses, different levels of detail, sets, no sets, and of course, the biggest and most unpredictable variable: Price.

It was an incredibly hard decision choosing which ones to buy. I actually had to just put them all down and go somewhere else for a while to calm down before going back to decide which ones I wanted.

In the end, I bought three.
First was a matching set of my two favorite characters, the stoic Nagato and Haruhi, the great and terrible.
I also couldn't resist a smaller version of Haruhi, both because of the cool schoolroom set she came with, and her intensely dissatisfied expression.

Total Damage: 5,250 Yen ($45.58)

All in all, the damage was moderate, considering that this was my first run-in with collectibles from a show I love, that you absolutely cannot get in America. I WAS rather disappointed with their lack of Nagato figures, though (her being my favorite).

I wandered back in the direction I had come after that, and spotted a store I had briefly entered when I first arrived, before being driven back out by hunger. It most closely fitted the American description of a "toy store" of all the shops I had visited. Plastic, plastic, nothing but plastic.

It was beautiful.

It had a lot of retro junk, but also some semi-modern pieces. It was those that had caught my eye the first time I was there, and I aggressively searched them out again: Eva figures.

Now, this being probably the most famous anime series ever made, I knew I had to pay my respects. Plus, the merch was just plain cool. I didn't go bonkers, though. The main thing that caught my attention was one of the so-called Angels. He's a big sucker, but he doesn't move any. But I can't have him terrorizing my dorm room, can I?

Who shall rise up to oppose this fearsome beast?

None other than THIS GUY! Eva Unit 01.

He is EXTREMELY poseable, comes with two heads and about a million hands. Oh, yeah. I'm gonna have some fun with this one.

Unfortunately, this store, like pretty much FRIGGIN ALL OF THEM, did not allow pictures, for some reason. Which is a shame, because aside from all the merch, they had a life size Darth Vader, and a very odd display of a life-sized Spider Man with some sort of devil mask on.

I tried to take a picture of it, but the clerk came "sumimasen"-ing at me.

So, I did what I could. Crossed the bridge to the other side of the street, and tried to take a picture from there.
It didn't turn out great.

Total Damage from this store: 3,300 Yen ($28.65)

Aside from all that, the rest of the trip was pretty much aimless wandering. I was getting tired, my shopping bags were heavy, and my wallet was conspicuously lighter. I knew I didn't want to spend any more money, so I just kind of wandered in the general direction of the station, stopping at whatever shop caught my eye.

I told myself I was only looking, but man, was it hard. Of special danger were those wolves in sheep's clothing, the Gachapon machines. It seems so innocent, just one or two hundred yen per turn. But then you get another one, and another one, and another...

Well, you get the idea.

Anyway, about the time I found another stockpile of Haruhi figures, complete with several varieties of Nagato I barely managed to keep myself from buying (this time), I figured it was about time to head home.

On the train ride back, I took the time to muse about the preponderance of adult merchandise mixed in with all the tamer Otaku fare. As I said before, most of it was sort of tacked on upstairs, an addition to the regular stuff. But there were plenty of shops where it was all mixed together, and I did spy at least one store that was COMPLETELY devoted to selling adult videos.
Eh? What do you mean, "Did I buy any?" That's an absolutely preposterous question. I thought we already went over the prices of DVDs in Japan. D:< href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fujoshi">Fujioshi streaming in and out of the shops, along with their scruffy male otaku counterparts, passing by each other without so much as a blush as they went about their shopping.

But what I really wonder about is the adult model/figure industry. All the shops I went in had, in addition to the tamer stuff such as what I bought, large quantities of significantly more risque figures. Well, perhaps risque is a bit of an understatement...

In any case, these are obviously getting manufactured by the truckload, and presumably being bought up like there's no tomorrow. But by WHO?

These aren't like a cheap rag that people buy in a gas station and throw away the next day. We're talking big, permanent pieces of "art" that go for tens of thousands of yen. What are these people doing with them? Shoving them in their closet? Setting them on their coffee tables as a conversation piece?

God knows.

All I know is that if I'm gonna shell out cash money for a model of one of my favorite anime heroines, she's going to be in attire suitable for me to stick her up on a shelf where everyone can see her.

I guess some people don't have to worry about visitors. :|

In any case, I did make it home alright, worn but happy.
The total damage to my pocketbook was about 13,287 Yen ($115.37), so that pretty much takes care of my spending money for... the year...
At least, the part I earned myself.

And I only visited the tiniest little fraction of the Otaku Heaven called Den Den Town. :|

I'll be back, but not until my wallet has time to heal. XD

As it turns out, the gundam I bought are More than Meets the Eye [/horrible pun.]
They actually all transform, which really takes me back to my power rangers days. Good times, good times...

For details on them, and more fun with my eva figure, just check out my photobucket account.

As for myself, I've spent three days writing this, so I think it's time to wrap it up.

This is Timzor,

Signing off.

PS: My shelves look much less empty now, yes?
Click
Click

Woot! Otaku Town, here I come!

I'm psyched. Immediately after I made my last emo post, and started racking my brain for things to do this weekend, the answer hit me like a ton of brightly colored bricks.

I'm going to Den Den Town.

I should probably explain. In Tokyo, there is a part of the city called Akihabara. It is well known as the otaku capital of Japan. There are shops that sell everything otaku: computers, electronics, games, toys, models, anime, manga, you name it.

Well, in Osaka, they have their own version of that district: Nipponbashi, or Den Den Town. Even though I'll be going it alone, I'm completely psyched about it. I don't know whether the stores will be open on Sunday, but my teacher said that most of them should be open on Monday, because stores like that usually open on holidays, even if they're not usually open on weekdays.
Why am I not going on Saturday? Well, I was going to, but my "home visit" (cheap knockoff of homestay for people who couldn't get a real homestay family) partner wants me to go with her to her friend's house to make takoyaki. Now, I haven't even met her FAMILY yet, the whole point of the program. And I don't think I'm gonna be a big fan of fried octopus dumplings, either. But hey. When you're a lonely nerd floating around in Japan, and you get an invitation to hang out with a couple cute girls and get some free food, you don't turn that down.

Aaaanyway.

I've been looking all over the internet for stores to visit, how to get there by train, etc. I seriously think I haven't been this excited since I got here.
Wai!

I'll let you know how it turns out.


Man, could there be any more blue words in this post?

That can't be a good sign, either.

I'd like to preface this with something:


I'M BORED!

Here I am, in Japan, the Otaku Mecca, and the best way I can find to spend my time is to putz around on the web, or aimlessly ride the train, when I'm not slaving away studying?
I mean, seriously. I've been here for weeks, and I haven't been abducted by aliens, sent back to feudal Japan, been contacted by a spirit, found a giant robot, saved the world
Okay, maybe I'm not being too realistic...

But I have been here a while, and haven't done ANYTHING relevant to my geeky interests. In fact, aside from that trip to Kyoto, I haven't really done...

ANYTHING.

And there's a three-day weekend coming up, and I actually won't be sick this time (hopefully).

So what should I do? Or maybe the better question is, who should I do it with? I still haven't exactly made any... "friends" per se.

There are a few people I pal around with, but I'm still not really in any solid groups. One of my "pals" is doing something interesting: Going to the Tokyo Game Show (think Japanese E3, open to the public for 10 bucks a pop), followed by a huge Japanese rave. I was very tempted to invite myself along with him and his buddies, but I found out that they have made arrangements weeks in advance for transportation, etc., so we wouldn't have been able to go together, anyway.

And as cool as it sounds, I don't think I want to go to a huge event like that alone.

I guess the only thing I can do is search the web for some interesting things to do in Kyoto or Osaka, and go all by myself.
:| Whee.

Oh, well.... it could still be fun, I guess. You take in more when you're alone, anyway.

On to the title of the post:
For about a day, I thought things were going well with the new roomy. We got along, he slept in the room, and above all, things were NORMAL.

Then came the next day. Or, yesterday.

This time, he wanted to go to sleep, and I still had studying to do. So, to try to be accommodating, I pulled my books, notebooks, and computer into the common area to study there.

A few seconds later, I had to go back in for a pencil.

A few minutes later, I had to go back in for a book.

A while after that, I had to go back in to get my dictionary.

Eventually, when I was done (and felt tired enough to sleep), I headed back into the room at around 2 or 3.

And of course, made a lot of noise putting all my stuff away, setting my alarm, etc.

Then I laid down to sleep. And that was about when Michael got up.

First, he stood around the room for a while, huffing and puffing discontentedly.
Then, he left.
And came back.
And left.
And did this a few more times. More restless pacing than you could shake a stick at.

Eventually, he left for more than a few seconds, and when he came back, he finally went back to bed.

The next day, he was acting SERIOUSLY weird.
I walked into the room, which before now, has always been extremely tidy. The place was a mess. Laundry everywhere. I couldn't stifle an exclamation, before I noticed that Michael was actually in the room. He was sitting at his desk, with a youtube video running, with his forehead straight on the desk, looking like he was about to pass out, or be sick, or SOMETHING.

I asked if he was alright, and he wouldn't speak to me directly, just mumbled. He managed to communicate that he was fine, but he obviously wasn't.

He stayed like that for a while.

I left to go do something for a minute, and when I came back, the room was empty. I got to my desk and turned to sit down, and HE WAS IN THE EFFING CLOSET!

He was just sitting in there, on top of the dresser and under the shelf, huddled up in the corner, all pulled up together. I jumped, and shouted something, and asked him if he usually spends time in the closet. "No," he moanbled.
"Are you sure you're okay?" I asked .
"Super Genki," he replied. (Genki is Japanese for healthy and energetic)

He stayed in there for a while, just sitting there. Eventually, he left and slouched out of the room. When he came back in, he sat at his desk again for a while in about the same pose I found him, making unhappy and frustrated sounds for a while. Then he went BACK into the closet and partially shut himself back in.

He stayed there for at LEAST a half an hour.

I don't know what to make of it, guys. Maybe I'm paranoid, but I feel like he's trying to send me a message.


Or maybe he's just nucking futs.

THAT's not a good sign...

My new roommate slept outside last night because he couldn't stand the sound of my breathing.

I got all moved into my room yesterday. Things went smoothly enough, until around 1:00, when Michael, my new roommate, decided it was time to sleep. So we turned out all the lights, I put on my headphones, he laid down, and I continued to use my computer.

I was trying to be very quiet, but as I was sick, I couldn't help the occasional cough or sniffle. After a few minutes, I heard Michael mumble something. I took off my headphones and asked him what it was.

"Can you go blow your nose, or something?" he asked.

"Um... yeah. But, I mean, it's just gonna come back. I mean, I'm sick. Sorry," I responded. I went off to blow my nose, to little effect due to my congestion. I came back and continued whatever it was I had been doing.

A few minutes later, he mumbles something again. I take off the headphones again, and ask him what he wants.

"Can you take that outside and work on it? There's an Ethernet jack near the table, and there's no one else out there."

Well, I thought I was being pretty quiet, and my roommate from last year and I routinely used the computer while the other was sleeping. "Um, is it really bothering you?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'm trying to sleep. I'm hardly ever in here except to sleep, but when I'm in here, I need to sleep," he responded.

So, I had to make a choice. Do I try to be as accommodating as possible, and let myself be run out of my new room the first night there? Or do I decide to be rude and inconsiderate, and stay there regardless?

I decided to compromise.

"I'll be done in a few minutes," I said. It was getting late, after all. So I took about five minutes to wrap things up, and shut down the computer. Then I laid down and tried to get to sleep.

I could hear that Michael was restless on his side of the room. I figured it might be because of my breathing. It was a little louder than normal, since I was sick and a bit congested. Still, it wasn't whistling, or bubbling, or anything like that.

But within a few minutes, with an exasperated sigh, he sat bolt upright, grabbed his pillow, and stalked out of the room. A few seconds later, he returned, and dragged his entire futon set out of the room. I tried to catch his attention to confirm what was wrong. "Dude?" I asked.
I only received a mostly incomprehensible mumble in return. It sounded something like "I'm just gonna go out here..." and then he left.

I'm not really sure what to make of this, to be honest. Is he an incredibly light sleeper? Has he never had a roommate before? Or his he just being spiteful because he had to give up the single room he was never supposed to have?

And what should I do? I don't think it's all that unreasonable to quietly use my computer while he's sleeping, and I certainly can't do anything about my BREATHING. And what's going to happen when he finds out I SNORE? I mean, I've had to put up with sleeping in the same room with snoring people before. It's just a fact of life. But I get the feeling that he's not going to react very well to it.

I talked to some of the other people in my unit about it. I asked whether he had said anything about me moving in, and they responded "Just a general sentiment of... regretting it."
I told them about the specific situation of what happened, and asked what they thought. I also brought up the problem of my snoring.

They seemed to think it would be best if I could change how I breathed, and to try not to snore. I pointed out that I can't control how I breathe, or whether or not I snore, since I'm ASLEEP. They responded that you can never be sure until you try, and "helpfully" pointed out that snoring is sometimes health related, and that maybe I should get out and be active more.
Other than that, they suggested that if my snoring is keeping him up one night, and he wakes me up about it, I should drag my futon outside and sleep in the common are to "meet him halfway" about it.

"Umm... you call that meeting him halfway?" I asked.

"Well, that's true. I guess you'd be doing all the work. But it was his room first."

"Yes, but he was never supposed to have a single room. He signed up for a double just like the rest of us, and if he had a single room for a couple weeks, then that was just his good luck."

"Well, you moving in here is a big adjustment for all of us."


What have I done? Have I moved from a unit of people basically indifferent to me, into a unit that actively wants me gone?